Monday, October 31, 2011

Helen's Cousin From San Jose


So. Found this gem on the pavement of my bus stop at 7th and J Street...mentioned it in 120s for you who were there.


As near as I can figure, the author is either a man or a woman (lol), so scenario one is:


Male. Let's call him Bob. Bob knew Helen for some reason. Maybe they were friends or maybe they were lovers, but things didn't stay tight like that. Helen's cousin (from San Jose) comes out for a visit. Maybe she's heard great things about Bob and wants to stake her claim. Bob isn't having any. So....Helen's cousin (from San Jose) goes around the town trash talking him. Bob isn't down with this, so stages a passive-aggressive note on a random sidewalk two blocks from the jailhouse.



Scenario two is more likely, as you've got decent penmenship and the unnecessary use of commas. (Come on...I'm right, aren't I?):


Female. We'll ignore the possibility that she's speaking of herself in the third person and assume this concerns three women. We'll call our main character Robin. Helen's cousin (from San Jose) heard about the rockin' times that Helen and Robin were having down in old Sactown and wanted a piece of that action. She trains on down, but Robin doesn't want anything to do with her. She's good with fast times with her bestie Helen. Helen's cousin (from San Jose) feels her offer of friendship spurned and begins to smear her already somewhat shady reputation around the streets. Robin goes passive-aggressive on her dirty blond head of lies and invective and posts a paragraph of doubtful prose.


In the comments, explain why her puncuation is incorrect lol

10 comments:

Lynn said...

I am loving this blog!

redgirl said...

Heh...thanks! I don't post much anymore (skoool), but there are tons of archives :)

Anonymous said...

I found a similar note. Im guessing I know which 7th & J youre talking about. This one was on a bus stop right in front of SCC.
Whoever this person is, he (or she) probably rides the transit. :P

https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/375867_10150375574947705_544007704_8463395_88790484_n.jpg

redgirl said...

This is really too perfect... thanks for the comment!

Anonymous said...

I found a similar note.

it said:
The fact that helens cousin from san jose was targeting me, exposed her as someone whose beliefs are not in me.

Anonymous said...

Helen's cousin from San Jose, tried to see in me, what was never there; instead of just changing what she didn't like about herself.

Anonymous said...

Helen's cousin from San Jose, tried to see in me, what was never there; instead of just changing what she didn't like about herself.

From the person who wrote with chalk, the messages on the sidewalk, that pictures were taken of, and put on this web page. said...

Helen's cousin from San Jose, kept hostility in my path/personal space, as retaliation for my choosing not to go to her level.

From the person who wrote with chalk, the messages on the sidewalk, that pictures were taken of, and put on this web page. said...

Helen's cousin from San Jose, kept hostility in my path/personal space, as retaliation for my choosing not to go to her level.

Anonymous said...

In regards to what I posted a while back, about putting anything about Helen's cousin from San Jose, on a web site; I only got as far as completing the Word document. However, I never put any of it on the internet. Also, I threw the word document away. I am not going to put a web site on the internet. After I post this blog, I won't visit any blog web sites on the internet, anymore.