Bursting forth through the twilight of a semi-jobless state, I return to the battlefield of customer service, ready to gather stories into the basket of plenty.
I abandoned the homestead after obtaining the job of *gasp* phone surveyor. Gotta use that sexy phone voice, right? A few things about that job didn't quite stack up to expectation.
I found that I really didn't enjoy calling in every day at 2:30 to see if I had work at 4:30. That may have just been me. I was allowed to have my sense of humor....as long as it wasn't on the phone. Can't be biasing those surveys. And really? Those surveys were either:
A) So ridiculous they were funny
B) So boring my brain found a way to make them funny
Whether you reached your call quota was mostly luck. My last day, I was expected to reach a quota...all while calling elderly woman in their 90s. The very last survey I did was an 18 minute survey with a 96-year-old woman that took over an hour to complete because we needed to fill that age/area quota.
And finally, I didn't relish suddenly having no income for over a week because there wasn't a survey going when I had to pay rent.
Cue: new job search!
My deal is that if I can just land the interview, I can get the job. I don't know if it's that I'm lucky, that I've had crap jobs all my life (oh, wait, no, that's not the case), or that I put on a great show of sparkly competent charisma, but that's my experience. But, there's the key. (lol @ pic = bad pun)
I began applying right and left, flailing about the Intenets for jobs. I stopped keeping track of what I was applying for. Finally, one day coming back from lunch:
Friend A: You're phone was vibrating like crazy.
Friend B (yes, I have more than one): Like crazy.
Me: Ha...maybe it's a job offer.
Them: (Pitying smirks)
Me: (listens) Um...guys...it actually is.
Well, it was an interview offer at least. It was for a Customer Service Rep at a Vet hospital.
Her: ....are yous still looking?
Me: (HELL) yes :)
One of the questions asked was, "Why do you want to work at a veterinary hospital?
Me: Ummm...well, because I like the professional aspect of running a hospital, but enjoy the atmosphere of helping animals and all that junk.
Just kidding. I left the last part out. I enjoy working around animals, especially now that I don't have a pet of my own and can't see to get one in the near future. The next hurdle was that the job she was offering was full time...during the day. I told her about school, and it basically came down to that, if they liked me, they would put a night person on day shift and give me the night.
Interview went very well, was there for over two hours and started hearing the "when you work here" phrase. Queue forward to the working interview (make sure the rest of the team doesn't hate my guts on sight/I don't run screaming out the door), and we're back to "we'll let you know in a few days."
I don't mind saying I really wanted the job at this point. REALLY wanted it, and thought I was on my way to getting it. But oh well.
Then, as I'm chatting in pharmacy, the call comes from ... let's call her Diane, to see her in her office. First words out of her mouth: "I've been waiting to hear from my boss so I can hire you."
So here we go, Readers! Jump on the train leaving the station, making stops at awkward faux pas with customers, irritating co-workers, sub-intelligent phone conversations, and overbearing clients! I, Redgirl will head to the trenches and take one (or more) for the team to bring you the goods.
To start you off:
Man is standing by check out.
Me: Have you been helped?
Him: Yes, picking up.
Me: Animate or inanimate? (Like, you know, prescriptions or your pet after surgery or something)
Him: Inanimate (<---pleasant expression)
Two minutes later, see coworker come 'round corner with ... a box of ashes. Apparently, "pet" and "inanimate" are not discrete categories.
*Mentally updating personal venn diagram references*
Ah, well, that one's on me.