All for a Pen

Here at the Inn, we were pretty full. I had some rooms left, but not many (that's Memorial Day for you...). I'm dreading the 40 or so check ins I have coming in a bit later. At least half of them will consist of extremely tired tweenies that shine with unknown sticky substances and their parents expectations that I will like their children.

Point is, that while I'm willing to sell rooms, I'm not inclined to go out of my way to do it at this point.

Let's call our star of the hour Penny.

Penny: How much are your rooms tonight?

Me: 165

Penny: Oh. Well, are your towels organic? (is it just me? I thought organic refers to something you EAT)

Me: They're made out of....cotton...

Penny: But is the cotton grown organically?

Me: You know? I'm not sure.

Penny: Oh. Because I need towels. (that's....nice?) Do you have a pool?

Me: Yes.

Penny:Nice! Is it heated?

Me: It's....SOLAR heated (lol)

Penny: Huh?

Me: (wishing I had kept my mouth shut) Well, when it's hot outside, the pool is warm, when it's cold....anyway but no.

Penny: Ok, thanks (leaves)

So now I'm all excited. She's gone, and I can continue to stare out the window and bemoan the soccer teams coming in. But then...she comes back.

Penny: Do you serve breakfast in that room?

Me: Yes (I neglect to tell her it's a full breakfast, omelettes etc and that it's free)

Penny: Is that the bar?

Me: Yes (....aaand...ALso neglecting to mention it's free when open)

Penny: Are there towels in the rooms?

Me: (geeze lady, have you ever stayed at a hotel before???!!) Yes...

Penny: Would they know if some were missing?

Me: (I'm so glad I pick up on these subtleties) Well yes, Housekeeping knows how many towels are in the room, and if any are missing, the room is charged.

Penny: Oh. (thinks for a moment) Are there pens in the rooms?

Me: Yes...... (God have mercy...)

Penny: Oh! Then I'll definitely stay!

So. What did we learn? We learned that Penny needs towels, and therefore is willing to pay over $175 dollars (there was tax too) in order to possibly steal towels from the room...which will then be added to the bill. (I put a note on her reservation to check the number of said linens upon checkout) As for our pens...Well, I have to be honest. Our pens ROCK. They are maroon with little clear grips and gold writing. They also have sinuous pen caps. Yes indeed...these pen caps are contoured, and then......that little clip thingy that no one actually uses on their shirt pocket but just sticks on the end of the pen to make it look longer does this little swoopy thing. They also write with surprising ease, the ink smoothing marking the paper in the perfect line thickness.

Problem?

She hadn't seen our pens.

She didn't know the beauty that was in store.

It really makes one wonder.