On the Subject of Cats

I like cats. I will even go so far to say that I LOVE cats.

The other side of the coin is not so lovely. Cats hate me. It's really not fair. All I want to do is love them! Below, I shall use incidents from the past to prove that I love cats.

A) Playing games with them
Mel had a cat that had lovely fuzzy long black and white fur. Our side pasture flooded out, so the only thing "dry" was a big mound of DG jutting up from the center. Enter...the island!! Pan (short for Panchromatic) happened by and I...*ahem* we...wondered what would happen if we put him out there. In a scientific sort of way, we performed the experiment. He swam back. (so cute!!) So we put him out there again. He swam out again. (so wet!!) When we put him back a third time, I think he figured it out.

B) Helping hone their hunting skills
My roommate is fostering some kittens. I was sitting, watching the really shy one play in a blanket, so I moved my foot around under the blanket to help him practice hunting. He overshot the blanket and ended up putting a bloody scratch in one of my little toes. *sniff* And I was only trying to help!!

C) Giving them baths
Same kitten litter as before, different kitten. The bath water was warm and nice and rather full. Little Isis was poking her nose into the tub area--she was obviously curious about the whole thing! I thought back....couldn't remember the last time she had a bath, so thought to help her out. **Sploosh** Aaaand...wet cat! (aaw, so cute!) You'd a thought she'd a thanked me, but no. Ungrateful feline.

D) Cuddling them
I love having kitties sit on my lap. I like picking them up. My flatmate has a bipolar cat (not kidding--she was abused as a kitten), so some of her signals are "apparently" off. There I was, walking through the hallway, and the cat gets up and meows at me. She looks longingly into my eyes. As far as I could tell, we were a go. So. I picked her up. She starts hissing and meowing bloody murder. Flatmate calls from room "What are you doing to my cat!!??"
Me: "Nothing!!" (do best to put cat down without bloodletting, cat continues to wail)
Her: (emerges) Mindy! what did she do?"
Me: She wanted me to pick her up...so I did
Her: She looks like she does, but she's lying.
So much for love and affection

So I am afraid to get a cat when anyone else is present, because then it might love them instead of me. Like it's supposed to.