Tuesday, January 25, 2011


Ah, MexiGong! You never cease to delight me with not only your customers, but with the bonus events for your regulars!

First, you sent in Steve. Steve told me that he came in because our drive-thru was closed.

Steve: I thought it was strange, but I figured maybe you're just fixing it.
Me: Our drive-thru is open (I gesture). What would make you think so it was closed?
Steve: (Points in opposite direction) But it had signs on it saying it was closed!
Me: That's the drive-thru that belongs--er--belongED to the locally owned Mexican restaurant next door that shut down last year....

Steve was good...but you had a pleasant surprise for me. You weren't done for the night! You sent in Chad, the hopeful flashlight salesman to dart in and out of our drive-thru trying to sell a flashlight, but succeeding only in being creepy! Folk were kind of concerned; locked their car doors and such, but *I* enjoyed the fruits from your degenerative tree!

And then told a manager. I want to keep my job in your hallowed halls, after all...

When I was on my lunch, you invited the cops over for a spot of "bathroom commotion". Two of them. Must be close friends of yours, interrupting the dinner hour like this. I tried to conceal my curiosity, not wanting you to be ashamed of your employee. I knew I could get the facts from another such. In the mean time, you had another surprise! The women's bathroom looked like someone had taken 2 1/3 tacos, crushed them in a ceramic bowl and added liberal sauces of every hue, then allowed their 2 year old to paint the bathroom with the debris!

And someone gave that child a stool...as I reflect how high up some of those deposits are...

I noticed another thing, but I wanted to ask about it before I bothered you with it. After my inquiries, I have no choice.

Dearest MexiGong, Do you know where the women's restroom trash can is? It's a small little thing, lithe and black; sits between the wall and the commode? It was there when I came on shift, and there when I started my lunch. But now, you see, it's gone. No trace of it remains. Yes, I've looked everywhere--outside, in the restaurant, in the men's bathroom (oh the horror!). I just though you might like to know, knowing how women can be and all. 

But oh, MexiGong! You saved the best for last, you playful gong you! I mean, when I found out why the police were there! I have it from a number of witnesses that the aforementioned young man (Chad) attempting to sell his flashlight was found passed out in the men's bathroom with his trousers down. So the police came. And they found paraphernalia of a *particular kind* on his person. 

Which of course they did.

I would think passing out on the floor of an as yet un-mopped fast food restaurant bathroom floor pretty much requires you to be high.

So? Any ideas where the trash can has gone? Perhaps how much the druggie got for his flashlight in the drive-thru? (considering he bought something about 10 min before the "incident") Anyone passing out in y'all's various places of employment? Share the love!


lifeshighway said...

my job just sucks! There are never any passed out druggies on the floor much less with pants down.

You would spoon with me... if I asked nicely.

lifeshighway said...

sigh, I have been edited by redgirl.

redgirl said...

You have been edited by my school's firewall and allowed by the generosity of Starbuck's :P

Anonymous said...

Dunno but some of the managers and employees have fun by classifying the clientele by what drugs they are probably on and I do believe I sent you the "dude passed out in the bathroom story". The trash can is probably being vended to the employees of the Burger King drive thru window down the street
yo' sis

redgirl said...

Hmm...you're right. The trash can was probably taken as a pernicious bit of corporate espionage. I'm TOETs going to Burger King now and nabbing something of theirs. Suggestions? Haven't been to BK in AGES.